Today I Remembered...

Here's poem two for my poetry class. It's hard to describe the actual assignment so the poem will seem really weird and random out of context, but just know that it was written to fit the assignment. Anyway, you'll know what it is about... but it is not about me (like most of the poems I have written).

Today I Remembered
I can't stop thinking about you
and it's driving me insane
You still haunt me every day
in this world of pain

My life is so different without you
which is the way it has to be
I'm filled with so much anger now
about the way you treated me

Today I saw originality
it reminded me of you
the way you came up with excuses
for everything you'd do

Today I saw silverware
such a simple thing
but it reminded me of all the threats
and how much the cuts would sting

Today I saw an animal trapped
that's how I felt when we dated
you would do things just to piss me off
thing you know I hated

Today I saw a bird shit
it splattered everywhere
it reminded me of your shit
how you pretended to care

But then I saw him put his arm around her
and kiss her gently on the head
it reminded me of how sweet you could be
how gently you'd hold me in bed

And I saw him look at her
and whisper softly in her ear
it reminded me of the times you held me
softly telling me I had nothing to fear

I saw him reach for her
and gently take her hand
you had such a power over me
that I will never understand

But then I saw her pull away
with pain in her eyes
and I remembered who you really are
I remembered all the lies

I remembered all the bruises
and all the tears I cried
I remembered the night you beat me so hard
that night I almost died

I remember all the hospital visits
the times I "fell down the stairs"
all the excuses I'd come up with
and you convinced me that nobody cares

I remember how you'd grab my arm
Leaving bruises from squeezing so tight
and the times you'd throw things at me
or how often I cried through the night

I remember the sound of the door slamming
the smell of alcohol on your breath
the taste of cigarettes when you kissed me
oh, how you used to make me wish for death
--Written 9/15/05