When will the busyness end???

Ouch...

Today, I slammed my thumb in the car door. The door actually closed on my thumb and I had to pull the handle with my other hand. It hurt so much. My neighbors must have thought I was crazy because it hurt so much that I couldn't breath and Icould not make a sound. So, instead, I dropped my phone (which broke in half) and threw my car keys into the yard (which I later had to go looking for) and I hunched over groaning and making weird noises (amazingly no vulgarity came out of my mouth) and then I walked up to the porch and rang the doorbell hoping my brother would come to the door as quickly as possible. My entire thumb under my nail is bruised and on the other side there is a nice bruise in a line and a nice indentation.

Dad wanted me to go to the hospital because I couldn't really feel my thumb and he thought I may have nerve damage. I haven't decided if I will go or not. He also told me that the next time he sees me he is going to wrap me in foam because I am a "walking hazard..." It's so true.

Anyway, just thought y'all could get a nice laugh out of my stupidity.

first attraction

Yesterday, Ari and I went out for table side guacamole at Cozymels (which was amazing, by the way). When we were there we were talking about how Ari has never dated a girl he was friends with first. I said, "yeah but we were friends before we started dating" and he told me that that was kind of true and that even though we were friends he always knew that he wanted to date me. Which I didn't actually know. I started thinking about when I realized I wanted to be dating Ari and after thinking about it this is what I decided. One of the first things that attracted me to him was when he decided he wanted to come up to Michigan with me, when he barely even knew me. But the day I knew I could date him was a month before we started dating. The weekend after Michigan. Here's the story...

A group of us drove up to Lake Geneva in Wisconsin and rented a boat and went tubing and water skiing and whatnot. That ended up being one of the best days ever! Then we were driving home and Ari was driving and I was in the front seat and it was 12:30am and I saw some sprinklers on the side of the road so I said, "lets go run through the sprinklers" half joking. Ari said "okay" and pulled over the car. We both got out (everyone in the back was sleeping) and ran through the sprinklers and got back in the car. It was awesome.

Almost everyone who knows me knows that I constantly say things like that secretly hoping that people will do crazy things with me but knowing that they will always so no. Well, from that day on I could always count on Ari to be crazy and random with me. Which made me quickly fall for him.

Grandma Dedic

When I was growing up, and still to this day, I alway had a kind of second family; the Dedics. Madeleine and Ken were my (as Erika would say) back up mom and dad. Carrie was the only sister I ever knew and Kenny was just like another brother (as if I needed any more). When I was a kid I remember seeing grandma dedic at all of the big gatherings at the dedic's house and I loved it. She was always such a wonderful person. I remember how her eyes lit up whenever one of her grandchildren walked into the room and how she genuinly cared about each and every family member, and that included the Thomas'. She made me feel special. She was different than any other person I knew. It wasn't that I ever liked her more than my grandmas (my grandmas are pretty wonderful as well), it was just that I enjoyed being in her presence. I enjoyed the atmosphere that she brought with her everywhere she went. As I grew older I learned to appreciate her sense of humor and quick wit. I loved her a lot and always thought of her as another grandma of my own. When my mom called me on Tuesday to tell me that she had passed away, I tried so hard to not let it bother me. I tried so hard not to cry (which I think bothered Ari a lot). Then I went to the wake on Thursday and avoided the casket and told myself I was just there to be a friend to the Dedics. Then yesterday was the funeral. I lost it. I barely made it through the hymn they sang in the very begining. The thing was, as I looked around at all of Grandma Dedic's children and grandchildren and great-grandchildren my heart grew heavy. This amazing woman had an impact on so many people. Every one she came in contact with were deeply touched by her love. And it made me sad to know that whoever I marry will never get the opportunity to be loved by her. And if I ever have kids they wont get the chance to love her as much as I do. And then I started thinking about how much she suffered in her life. Through all the health problems and cancer and everything else, and she survived and lived her life... 91 years of her life. And now she is in Heaven with her Lord whom she loved so much, which just made me cry harder. But this time they were tears of joy. Tears rejoicing the fact that she had such a fulfilled 91 years of life. Rejoicing that she had so many people at her funeral that loved her and so many people who couldn't make it who loved her and were so deeply impacted by her.

So, in parting I just want to say...

We little knew that morning
God was going to call your name
In life we loved you dearly
In death we do the same
It broke our hearts to lose you
You did not go alone
For part of us went with you
The day God called you home

You left us beautiful memories
Your love is still our guide
And though we cannot see you
You are always at our side

Our family chain is broken
And nothing seems the same
But as God calls us one by one
The chain will link again.
-Author unknown

NEW PICS!

I just uploaded a bunch of pictures onto my website. To view them click here -- my photos

The new albums are:
New Years Eve--I went to a a family party at Aunt Cheryl's house which was, as always, really fun. Goodbye Ann--One of my best friends, Ann, went to Yemen for language school. This was her last night (well, her last night was spent with family, this was the night before her last night)
Fun times--These are mainly pics of fun times shared with my friends. From Ari and me just being us to a group of us driving up to Wisconsin for dinner to random pictures of random people. But it's fun! :) check them out

So jealous (but in a good way)

My cousin, Justin, is spending his semester in Australia. He is taking a bunch of great classes and doing a bunch of "once in a lifetime" things. Last week, he learned how to surf. How cool is that? Okay, for me, that is really cool, since learning to surf is on my list of things I want to do before I die. But seriously, this cousin of mine is now taking the month of February to travel (and he is miraculously only missing one class). So, he leaves for the Outback today and will be there for five days. Then next week he is going to Tasmania for five days. Then off to Caims for five days. And finally to Whitsunday Islands for three days. Did I mention that on his way to Australia he stopped for a week in Fiji and on his way home he will be in New Zealand for a week and a half? Man....

So, why am I telling you all of this? Because the way this trip is changing my cousin is humbling. He quickly adapted to the culture and idea of "no worries." He is enjoying the little things in life. He is off learning to surf and traveling and still getting schoolwork done and laying on the beach perfecting his tan and celebrating Australia Day and so on. Before he left he woke up at three in the morning to stand in line to get into the Price is Right and he appeared 37 times on the show (he was sitting right behing the contestants).

And when I think about all of this I ask myself, "self... what has happened to you?" I know this sounds really stupid, but I have let myself become the one thing I don't want to be. I go to class, go to work, come home and get my chores done, and then I am spent for the night. I wake up the next day and do it all over again. I rationalize before making any decision and miss out on a lot of fun things that way. I used to be the person that would up and go whenever. Ready for anything.

So these past two weeks I have been trying to change back to the old Monaca who loved life and randomeness. Which has been fun, I have ended up on two random two hour road trips. I have been more spontaneous and I have been laughing a lot more. Why aren't more people like this?

Anyway, I know that was a bunch of non-coherent, rambling but... you get the idea.